So Now ‘Professional Cuddling’ is a Thing…

When your ne’er-do-well son graduates from the Ball State with his bachelor’s degree in “liberal studies,” now there’s a job waiting for him out in liberal land.

Apparently, the industry of “cuddling” is finding a niche among millennial business and professional workers. And yes, it’s as creepily-uncomfortable as you think.

“Professional Cuddling” is growing in urban areas, fueled by young people entering the real world who simply don’t know how to function without constant reassurance.

The practice was featured on a Business Insider video that has since gone viral.

See? I told you it was creepy. Don’t you want to lie on a mattress on the floor while a total stranger paws and pads your lifeless body? No?

The “professional cuddlist” Dieniz Costa said that her studios are “safe spaces” where her clients can “explore touch.”

“More likely than not, they’re not getting the level of touch that they need in their everyday life,” Costa said of her clients.

On their website, they try to convince you that this is completely normal.

Our society is hungry to feel close to ourselves and others in healthy ways. Cuddling is a vehicle for this. We have done so much in the last 50 years to protect people from unhealthy abusive touch. Now we are ready to discover new ways to provide healthy nurturing touch. Separating it from sex is essential. We need to experience physical closeness as adults without the complications and pressure of sex. Cuddling is about being able to relax into whatever we are feeling in the moment in the presence of another person who sees that we are good. This is tremendously nurturing, even healing, in and of itself.

Creeped out yet? Buckle up.

While this particular “cuddle” group is located in the U.K., there are several similar organizations that do the same thing in the U.S. One of them is called (ready?): The Snuggle Buddies.

Their “female snugglers” page looks like something out of a 2005 escort website. They provide pictures of the “female snugglers,” along with reviews and comments.

Maddie in Burlington, Vermont, writes: “I’m a 31 year old Polyamorous female. I love cuddling, reading, going out for meals, & conversations! I have been told I am a wonderful cuddler! I love feeling that basic natural connection and feeling that is healing not only emotionally but perhaps physically as well.”

These groups insist that they’re not promoting prostitution. The Daily Wire reports:

After we watch some seriously awkward touching (guided by the “cuddle sutra”) between the cuddler extraordinaire and the client, Romeo discusses how pleasing the session was. According to the cuddled woman, the cuddling felt much shorter than it was (a full hour) and left her feeling “very relaxed.”

“Our society is hungry to feel close to ourselves and others in healthy ways. Cuddling is a vehicle for this,” says Cuddlist’s website.

“All human beings have bodies and emotions,” it reads. “We need to feel a sense of physical and emotional safety and belonging with others. This is the experience our cuddlists are trained to provide. It is pioneering work. We are bringing something new and needed to those who are ready to try it.”